The Madness of March: Can you feel it?


EUGENE, OR — It’s a rainy Selection Sunday and the clusterfuck of the NCAA tournament is just slightly less unnerving than the Jon Stewart / Jim Cramer fiasco.  Louisville was the only #1 ranked team in the competitive regions to win its Conference Championship, which is ironic considering the caliber of teams in the Big East this year.

Safe money will be on North Carolina, healthy or not.  But the reality is that any of the top twenty teams in the tournament have a real shot at dancing their way to a National Title.   That isn’t just the reality.  Every one of those teams believes it as well.   Depending on how the selections go, I could be hard pressed to call a second round 8 seed over a 1 seed a proper upset.  Shooting darts at the Sweet 16 will be just as reliable Andy Katz, Dick Vitale, and all the expert bracketologists that slither into the sunlight each March.

Old women and Hallmark cards say the same thing.  March comes in like a lion and out like a lamb.  And maybe it has in some years.  Some years, four number 1 seeds make the final four.  Some years, 9-5ers in the heartland of America watch ball games during their coffee breaks before getting back to clients, customers, and expense reports.  But this year, more people will be watching March Madness from the comfort of their homes, scouring while watching their brackets go to shit.  And I will be with them.   The Madness this March doesn’t just mean lunacy, it means red-hot anger.

And with this anger, Jon Stewart invited financial “guru” and former hedge fund executive Jim Cramer onto the set of The Daily Show.  I’m not going to go into the tired and redundant finger-wagging that makes the mainstream media salivate.  It’s unfair to say that CNBC should be the only investigative journalists in the business circuit.  They have become Stewart’s scapegoat.  Did they drop the ball?  Absolutely.  But when was the last time the mainstream media bucked the interest of their contributors for the interest of Truth and Justice?  Why does Stewart expect it to be any different this time?

Pass the buck.  No one could have seen it coming.  I’ll bet 300 grand on Pitt to make the final four when I’ve only got 10 grand in the bank.  No problem.

CNBC isn’t the only scapegoat in this orgy of billies.  Cramer squealed “Bernie Madoff” no less than three times during the interview when the conversation heated up.  I wish I would have caught him as well Cramer.  Wish I could have citizen-arrested Dahmer, Berkowitz, and Gacy.  But what the fuck does a Ponzi scheme have to do with investment banks leveraging 30 to 1 in legal accordance with every SEC regulation?  Madoff stole money from the register.   Wall Street built a mansion made of sand, sold the mortgage to the American people, and then sailed into the sunset when the winds came a coming.  But in the fine print of that mortgage, on the 277th page, was that damning clause:  SOLD AS IS.

The selections are made.  Wait for the news that Lawson is healthy before speaking to your bookie.   That should bring a surge of UNC fans to the table.  Bet big against baby blue.


One Response to “The Madness of March: Can you feel it?”

  1. Leslie Says:

    I can feel it!

    you’re probably right about UNC. Pretty sure they have the easiest bracket ever. always seems to happen that way… what’s Roy pulling over there?!

    No love for the Jayhawks?! Come on .. Beak em Hawks 🙂

    thanks for the entertaining article!

    haha – Maybe you’ll think this one is weird/interesting

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